YOUTH JOURNAL
A Woman in a Coffee Shop
July 2009
I wouldn't call myself a feminist. The label sounds a bit radical and I'm not big on any. Labelling is restrictive and a bit dangerous. People have labelled me throughout my whole life. Perhaps that's why I don't like labels. I'm thinking about labels because yesterday I went to a women's group for people who have disabilities. (Female people - that is!) Before I realized that it would be a women's only event, I asked if I could bring my boyfriend. Thank goodness I didn't. One look at the crowd and I'm sure the my boyfriend would have high tailed it to the closest movie theatre. The group meets every few months. There are some smart, friendly ladies in the group. Most are older than me and they teach me much just by being there. Seeing articulate, older, well-dressed, successful, family orientated women gives me hope. The women I saw yesterday were particularly inspiring because they face similar daily struggles as myself. If they have survived and thrived here on earth longer than myself, I am optimistic that I can too. Last night we had a barbecue. It rained off and on all day so I was a bit worried that the barbecue would be indoors. The sun came out right before I got there. I love timing that cooperates with social events! Who doesn't?
The place was busy, loud and crowded. Lots of people who use wheelchairs in one room leaves little space. I saw my friend Sarah. Years ago, Sarah and I were part of a summer program on a university campus. I loved being a part of the program. It gave me confidence to be independent and I met amazing friends - including a significant boyfriend. Every time I see Sarah, I am reminded of the summer we met. Seeing her makes reminisce, which is good. Sarah and I sat at our own table for a bit. I'm not sure why no one else sat with us, but we had a good talk. Sarah's health has been poor lately. She spent four months in hospital. Now Sarah is living in a retirement home. I was a bit surprised to hear this update. Sarah seemed to value her independence in the same way I do. She would be one of the last people I would think would go into a retirement home. Sarah said she enjoys being around people instead of living alone. I understand. Still though, is a retirement home really the most appropriate setting for a twenty-six-year-old female? I'm wondering if her room-mates are all sixty-years-old and up. I was afraid to ask as I didn't want to appear too intrusive. Whatever works for Sarah and makes her happy is what matters.
After dinner, there was a guest speaker on an event called Take Back The Night, a rally and march supporting women everyone. I support women, but the whole vibe was a bit anti-male. I like men. The march is considered illegal, because organizers don't want male police officers interfering. I understand why, but don't rally participants need protection, especially those with disabilities? What's wrong with female officers standing up? I don't think I will be participating directly in the event.